I have been told on numerous occasions that I was intimidating. Usually later in a friendship when we are reminiscing on when we first met and what our first impressions were. I have also heard it over dinner from crew members that I had just met and they usually go deeper in explaining what “intimidating” looks like to them. Got it all together, resting bitch face, mean, booshey, stuck up, better than, sassy, rude. Ew gross! I don’t want to appear like that ever! But apparently I have been coming across like that.
I chop it down to defense mechanism since a kid. Appear strong and together and no one will fuck with you. I guess now that I really love and accept myself, my face and body language has stuck to the habit of “appearing” Strong and together aka confident. Well I am strong! And I strive to keep it together every minute of everyday. Truth is I have so many insecurities and often times I find myself wanting acceptance from others. I tend to wait for someone else to say hi or strike up conversation. I prejudge how someone is and especially if I don’t get great vibes I usually stay to myself until a task or something causes us to have to interact with each other. Still secretly wanting connection and conversation. The longer the silence is the tougher I get. Lol. Human nature? No! Not at all. What the f@&$ is wrong with me!? With us?
I am a loving, fun, outgoing, connected man and there is no reason that I should appear intimidating to almost every single person that comes my way. The majority vote here is I’m not approachable. And that’s not cool.
Think of how many opportunities I’ve missed, gigs, connections, even great friendships, all because I came across as “cant be bothered bitch”.
Not everyone is out here to hurt us. So why have this same approach of intimidation to everyone that comes along?
I am going to make it a point to speak to everyone that I come into contact with. To BE Kind and loving to everyone. Smile more, introduce myself and strike up conversation. I will BE Approachable! Life is too short to be out here intimidating everyone and all just to end up alone and wondering “what is wrong with me”. If WE all would just BE Approachable, imagine the love that would be floating around. Connections made and the dreams that could come true. Collaborations and new creative partners. The possibilities would be endless.
Join me in BEing Approachable. Continue to BE Confident. Have your ish together and live regal and high on life but still BE Approachable. If anyone after this shift is still intimidated then it will be safe to say they have issues within themselves or they might just be haters.
BElieve, BE Free, BE YOUtiful… BE!