Monthly Archives: July 2016

conn conne

Abandonment issues! Always afraid of being left alone without someone close. The experience of being left alone because of life’s cycle or even because someone has chosen not to want to love you anymore. This is me! This is many of us.

My mother who is my best-friend, confidant, advisor (sometimes I am the one advising, lol), road dog, roller coaster buddy, napkin for my tears to fall into. OK I know you get it. She means the world to me!

I don’t like to think of the day she will leave me, but I do all the time. It overwhelms me sometimes because, even though I know I am loved and have other connections, family, friends, partner, but it’s not the same connection I have with mommy. Also she is my only immediate family member. Only child here. So The thought of being left alone without her here drags me heavy! With all of her illnesses, diabetes, high blood pressure, survivor of kidney cancer, living with one kidney lower than 60%, liver overworked, RA, anemia, I always fear the worst. BUT WHY? WHY am I WORRYING about this? While she is still smiling, laughing, living her life, wanting and yearning for time with me, I’m over here in my feelings and not just enjoying my time with her freely and without worry. Truth is I could be the one to get hit by a car or a plane incident, and clock out, God forbid!

If you have a loved one who is in their death bed or with an illness that is fatal do not treat them different or run and hide in fear of losing them while being close to them. Memories are to be made and LOVE is to be had! They live in happiness knowing you love them and are there loving them in celebration of who they ARE not pitying them for the state they are in. Well, this is my opinion or how I would feel.

It’s not just death! If you are like me in the sense of a relationship thinking someone is going to leave you because you are difficult or not up to their standards and you get all cloudy in your head and begin to distant yourself way before there is an inch between you (no distance at all, lol). STOP. Don’t worry about it. It is probably the reason your relationship is broken now. Enjoy your time with your lover. If they are not showing it back or you feel the disconnection remind them you love them and do as you can to show them the way YOU do. If they end up cheating on you, or leaving you, or disrespecting you where you have to leave, so BE it. Those things are out of your control! PERIOD. Continuing to worry and accuse, and argue, silent treatments, punishing, making jealous, whatever, is only pushing them away, causing them to rebuttal in a nasty way and it all causes you more insecurity, pain, grief, cloudy minds, and even illnesses! Enjoy him/her for the love you have, trust, watch, LOVE, BE, and if you can’t anymore then MOVE ON!

When you worry and don’t enjoy your loved ones fully it is a form of disconnect! While they are in your life LOVE them, BE with them, enjoy them, encourage them, be motivated by them, learn from them, teach them. BE Connected! As they can easily be the one to leave you, you could be the link that unchains mentally, physically, or even clocking out this world. While you can…..BE Connected!

BElieve, BE Free, BE YOUtiful…BE!

Keone Dent

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bel beli

Can you BElieve that a huge metal tube filled with over 200 people, cargo, plus luggage, equaling over 875,000 pounds or more can speed down a runway, catch some wind and stay in the air high above the clouds, for as long as 16 hours or more? If you never knew what a plane was or ever been on one you still wouldn’t BElieve it. It didn’t stop the Wright Brothers from believing their dreams of flying. It didn’t stop the manufactures and designers from Believing that they could make the Wright Brothers dream even bigger by creating passenger planes. Guess what, if you have been on a plane ride, you Believed too and trusted the creation of someone else. Strangers right? I mean do you know how an airplane is built? Do you know every person who has built a plane? Do you know how planes work? You don’t right? You don’t know ALL of these things, yet you Believed in them. No one said you had to Believe and really had NOTHING TO PROVE, just a dream and talent and the ability to BElieve in the unknown.

If you can BElieve in others dreams, shouldn’t YOU BElieve in your own? YES you SHOULD!

There is a saying that “seeing is Believing”. In some cases, this rings true to me. In many ways, however, I disagree with this. Believing is simply having faith!

Faith is; Complete trust or confidence in someone or something.

YOU are someone and something.

Faith is; a strongly held BElief or theory.

YOU have ideas and theories and TALENT. A PURPOSE! YOU Matter!

YOU must first BElieve in yourself! Expect no validation from anyone else. Except their opinions as just feedback, which is simply not based on anything else but their feelings and understanding. Once you BElieve and achieve they will see or feel/experience the results and they too will BElieve in you.

Other times it doesn’t have to be visibly seen in order to be Believed.  A thought cannot be seen, but many conversations we listen and share thoughts and ideas and before physically achieving the goal WE BElieve in them, enough to attempt them. This is BElieving in the comfort zone.

Then there is BElieving in a higher power. In my case I BElieve in God. I have never seen God. Yet I feel God through the creation of this world. My conscience, talking to myself, debating with myself, I BElieve is God’s voice. BElieve in a higher power. If you can BElieve in something you don’t physically see, why do you not BElieve that YOU were created for something great and trust in yourself and your HIGHER POWER to make dreams a reality?

There have been many times when I did BElieve in myself…….TO FAIL! Thinking I could never achieve that, or conquer this. I was right! Because I didn’t BELieve I could, I either didn’t attempt it or I did attempt it but with fear causing me to not give my all or quit all together. The times I did BElieve in the passion I had for something I accomplished and surprised myself. Not knowing if I was what a director was looking for in a show, or if I was the person deserving of passion and love from another person of interest, to not knowing if I was mentally or physically strong enough to get through a challenge. Some of my dreams have come true. Many have not. BUT I HAVE THE CHOICE and the ability to BElieve and then ACHIEVE! YOU DO TOO!

Just as WE BElieve the worst, it is important to BElieve the BEST!

BElieve in yourself, your dreams, your talents. BElieve in others to uplift, remember they matter and we need their talents and dreams to be met in order for it to domino affect the world. BElieve in your higher power (suggestion, GOD). This is important to BElieve something greater than you, can see you through this journey. I mean you didn’t create the world right? Something greater did. You’re a residence in this great creation. If you can’t BElieve in the unknown, my opinion is you can’t BElieve in the things you currently don’t SEE for yourself.

Do not fall short of your purpose, goals and dreams simply because you did NOT BElieve in them or because others doubted you. Make Believers out of non BElievers by simply BElieving. BElieve!

BElieve, BE Free, BE YOUtiful… BE!

Keone Dent

 

 

 

 

 

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