You have been asked to a dinner on Friday night @ 8pm. You of course you say yes. You have nothing to do currently, why not. Next someone asks you to perform at an event that starts @ 10pm. Sure you say. I mean hello you want to display your talents anyway you can. Saturday morning, don’t forget your boss asked you to work overtime. You want to look good for the boss and you need the money.  It’s a beautiful day when you get off work, better head to the beach with your friends because they asked you to meet up with them last week and you said YES! Saturday night rolls around and guess what, your girlfriend/boyfriend wants a night out with you on the town. That’s your boo, NO is not an option. Sunday comes. You are invited to brunch. Who doesn’t like good food and unlimited drinks? YES, YES, YESSSSSSSS. Sunday afternoon, dance recital, later, this, then that, then everything. All of these yeses, but do you realize you just told your body NO you can’t have rest. You also have set yourself up for possibly not committing and having to cancel because of time restraints or just simply doing more than you can handle. BE Selective and know what YOU can handle and commit to. It’s okay to have to sometimes say NO. it’s better to keep a realistic lifestyle, than to pretend like you can truly be stretched beyond superman/woman powers. People know your worth, talent, capabilities. If they truly do, they will ask again for your time, talent, help, company, whatever. You will have opportunities to say YES. Know when you must say no for the sake of your health and being burned out.

Okay, so maybe these things above do not apply to YOU. How about the following?

Your kids ask you for a special toy and it costs not too much, but enough to notice. Next your sibling needs help with a bill. Charity calls for a donation. Mom/dad need money for whatever (bad example, hello they are your parents). Friends want to go out and discover that they are short a few bucks (yeah right JUST DISCOVERED that, lol). You come across a sale at your favorite clothing store. Your girlfriend/boyfriend want to go to six flags this weekend. Yes…. YES of course. Yes…and more YES! Ummmmmm NO! Now your broke, can’t pay a few bills, have to move some funds around elsewhere and everyone expects you to always come through, not to mention, now they think your rich! BE Selective. Know when to tell people no. Know your limits. If people stop liking you because you can’t come through financially or any other way for them all the time then they are not really worth keeping in your close circle anyway. My opinion. This is all my opinion.

I am not saying don’t be there for people. It is very important to share and help and spend time and display your talents. However, you have to BE Selective in knowing what you can truly handle mentally, physically, emotionally. Also ask this. Are you a yes man but always hearing NO from these same people? Ask your toddler to sit down and be still. Not all but some will flat out say no. Yet, you say yes to everything they want. You are always showing up at events for others, supporting them for everything under the moon. Yet, when you call them because you need a little heart to heart time, they’re busy. You get it. I don’t want to be negative for too long.  Besides, if people are used to you saying yes all the time, they won’t know how to accept your no’s. It can get ugly.

Even with yourself you have to be able to tell yourself NO and know when Yes is ok. Over drinking, over partying. Eating too much bad foods. Over sleeping and snoozing constantly making you late for work. Buying every item you MUST HAVE that’s ON SALE. Then later, you complain about your kidneys hurting, You’re gaining weight, your upset because your boss is down your throat, All of your credit cards are maxed out. Hello!!! I Said HELLO! Know when to say no. Not right now. I guarantee that as long as you’re are alive there will be other opportunities for you to say YES.

BE Selective, Selective in a good way. Know when something is too much for you to handle and say NO. Know if you don’t want to put out because it’s too emotionally discharging for you even if he is cute, you can say NO. Your kids will not die if you say NO. Don’t break commitments because you have said too many yeses! Don’t sell yourself short by telling everyone around you yes and yourself NO. Most importantly. Keep in mind that as you have the right to say NO, and you do, Be Ready and understand others will also tell you no. Don’t take it too personal. The are only Being Selective.

BElieve, BE Free, BE YOUtiful…BE!

Keone Dent




3 thoughts on “BE Selective

  1. So… You might as well have inserted my name in this bad boy because you were most certainly reading me. Please keep telling the truth in the way that only you can. This is a HARD one! Especially from the Mommy perspective. You really want to be able to give your kids everything and do everything for them. I hate to see their faces look disappointed or sad… So that’s really hard for me. Always enjoy these!

  2. Hello! I’ve been reading your web site for a while now and finally got the
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  3. I can relate to this one, too. Sometimes I feel I say yes to a lot and as a result something has to give further down the road. I definitely need to learn to say no more. If not for the sake of sanity, for the sake of money. Well that sounded greedy but hopefully you know what I meant. Thank you for this.

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